As soon as it will be 15 days after my uncle’s death. I thought a lot if a I should or not talk about it, I will not go into details, but I can tell you that it was by age, without suffering and at peace.
The truth is it’s made me think a lot about my life. About this moment I’m going through. Yeap, the life has been going on and without realizing it I’ve been in the last few years before 40 and my son is already 15 years old. Incredibly frightening the speed of time.
These last two weeks I froze up again, soon after I restructured an effective routine. I could tell you that I felt extremely guilty for “allowing” this to happen, but I’m not going to do that, I don’t feel guilty or disappointed. Like I said, I paralyzed – but it was to think about my life.
Something here turned the key, clicked.
I’ve been feeling calmer and in a way less involved with problems that aren’t mine and that I can’t solve. A simple observer will say that I am “more patient” when in fact I see no reason. It’s not a lack of empathy, but I respect the need of others, it hasn’t always been like that.
What do I want? What do I plan? What do I want? Where am I going?
At this moment I don’t know how to answer none of this, the only thing I have very well defined is “what/who I don’t want for my life.”, knowing this is more than halfway, the rest things fit like the pieces of a puzzle.
And that’s about it and it’s okay!
I hope you’ll be great week too 🙂
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